What do you say to somebody when their CD sucks?

Mike Perlowin · Post by **Mike Perlowin** » 5 Apr 2002 1:59 am

I got this CD in the mail from a rock and roll wannabe. (Not a steel player.) I met him on a guitar forum similar to this one. The CD is just aweful. I can't think of a single positive thing to say about it.

What do I say to the guy? I don't want to hurt his feelings, but I also don't want to be dishonest. He seems like a nice guy, but he really is a terrible singer and guitar player.

Uwe Haegg · Post by **Uwe Haegg** » 5 Apr 2002 3:12 am

FWIW, if it were me I`d like to hear the truth.
Sure, I´d be disappointed. But that would
only make me more determined to do a better job next time.
He won`t get any better if nobody tells
him there is room for improvement.
Do it in a positive spirit and I am sure he will see the light once the initial disappointment has settled.
IMHO fake praising only makes it worse.
Say you go take a steel guitar course and the teacher tells you everything you do is
A ok- even though you suck. That gets you nowhere.
Be positive about your feedback

. Point out the things you like about his CD,there must be something, then the things you think could need some work and end it on a positive note telling him you would like to hear his next project, or something to that effect.
I got a little carried away there( I think). [This message was edited by Uwe Haegg on 05 April 2002 at 03:22 AM.]

erik · Post by **erik** » 5 Apr 2002 3:31 am

Did he say, "By the way, it's a rough demo"? Does he really believe it's good? Yeah, i'd rather people be honest with me. Don't kill the dream, maybe it's his version of having a sports card collection, or auto-graph book. Just say something like, "Yeah, keep rockin' man!"

side note: This thread will be moved to Music. I just know it.

Tony Prior · Post by **Tony Prior** » 5 Apr 2002 3:50 am

This is a tough one, problem is there are probably plenty of others that like it. SO generic "Good Job" would probably be most appropriate with the customary " "It's not really what I listen to" . I would find something to say that is positive after all the fellow did actually complete a project , something many of us would love to do.

I have received some music ( right up to very recently ) where folks have recommended it and I think it is the worst.

I think things are better left unsaid, unless it's my CD of course then I would expect emotional prasies of greatness ! But then again I don't have a CD ,....But I do have a website with practice MP3's for all to hear and it doesn't matter if folks don't like them cause' I already know they are just work in progress !

Good Luck
TPTPriorSteelGuitar

Johan Jansen · Post by **Johan Jansen** » 5 Apr 2002 4:05 am

Mike,
I think that you understand how much guts it takes for someone with a healthy mind to let you hear what he or she did. It's a part of his soul that he lets you share. I can imagine it's the same feeling when you show your baby for the first time to your family and friends. Everyone can be hurt by hearing how ugly that baby is...
Just tell him what you like about the CD, maybe it has a nice cover or the drums sound good. But please, don't tell negative things. It gives a lot of pain, I know....
Good luck!JJ

Joe Casey · Post by **Joe Casey** » 5 Apr 2002 4:08 am

I don't think I'd be so rude as to tell him it' sucks.But tell him on a scale of 1 to 10 it's a zero.

Tell him to keep his day job.And you will be doing him a favor.

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CJC

Rick Garrett · Post by **Rick Garrett** » 5 Apr 2002 4:22 am

Maybe just offer him advice that will make his next one sound better. Kinda hard to be honest to someone who sounds bad. Good luck!

Rick

Roger Kelly · Post by **Roger Kelly** » 5 Apr 2002 4:35 am

I agree with Johan...I would not dampen his spirit with negative remarks. If he stays with it who knows, he may hit it big in the R&R world. Stranger things have happened.

RON PRESTON · Post by **RON PRESTON** » 5 Apr 2002 4:38 am

Mike,....Hummmm????
Tough one for sure, I know, I have recorded many tracks for many different people such as C/W, Gospel, bluegrass, ect. I WANT to know what people REALLY THINK of my Steel, Guitar, Bass, B*#@$%o,(Yes,that is what I said, and I DO NOT want to repeat it AGAIN,:rolleyes

Now,Back to the serious stuff...Most will NOT tell you what they are REALLY thinking, because they or friends, BUT, The Engineer at the mixing board will MOST DEFFINATLY tell you,But most are afraid that they will hurt your feelings. I can't get better or be more unique with my difference of styles if I don't have "THE REST OF THE STORY". I don't know, Mike, I guess I would tell him that my DOG CHEWED(spell check?)it up because he liked the TASTEFULLNESS of his playing. Heck, Man, this forum is to HELP ONE ANOTHER,But...I'm afraid you are going to have to make some hard decisions here. Good Luck, Mike, and let us know how you handled the situation.

Steve Feldman · Post by **Steve Feldman** » 5 Apr 2002 4:47 am

Say: "thanks for the CD" and leave it at that.

Post by **Joey Ace** » 5 Apr 2002 5:08 am

This is one time I agree totally with Steve.

If pressed for more, I'd say honestly it is not my taste in music. I'd probably add that there are many people in the music biz, far more successful than me, producing music that is not appealing to me.

I would have advised Bob Dylan to stick to songwritting, and never let anyone hear his singing voice, guitar, or harmonic.

This has happened to me. I don't want to discourage anyone. I do tell them the reality of the music business. They've always appreciated the honesty.

It takes guts and effort to produce a CD.
I respect that.[This message was edited by Joey Ace on 05 April 2002 at 05:10 AM.]

Jeremy Steele · Post by **Jeremy Steele** » 5 Apr 2002 5:36 am

Tell him it's very.......interesting.

Chris DeBarge · Post by **Chris DeBarge** » 5 Apr 2002 5:57 am

Mike, I'll send you a copy of my CD, and you can practice telling me it sucks, you won't hurt my feelings!

Otherwise, I'm with Joey: "Sorry, it's not my cup of tea." You could further enhance it with "I usually only listen to Monks: Tibetan, Meredith, and otherwise."

Buddy Emmons · Post by **Buddy Emmons** » 5 Apr 2002 5:58 am

Mike,
Tell him "It's one of many in a world of so few," and let him figure it out.

Frank Parish · Post by **Frank Parish** » 5 Apr 2002 6:02 am

Sounds like a good time to practice your diplomacy. If you get really good you might get to go to the middle east and really practice.

Ric Nelson · Post by **Ric Nelson** » 5 Apr 2002 6:12 am

On some of my worst playing, people always said "sounds good" or "I like that song" or "eveybody sounds good", or "you guys are good" or "where do you play nowadays"?. But I knew before I left the session that I could have been better and I'd die everytime I'd hear it. That was the pre digi days, when it was hard to fix anything.

A close friend one time said "I really like that first song", which meant that the others sucked and they did. He was kind.He's still a close friend.

On a single I was on once, a DJ said, "I like the A side but the B side is a little weak". Put nicely, I'd say.

I learned a long time ago not to ask people how they like it anyway. If they do, they will tell you and buy the record/CD and if they don't, they just smile and move on.

Can't please everyone anyway.

Now if my mom (who was my true number one fan)would have told me it sucked, that would have done me in---total

Gosh, maybe it was just a bad mix. That always seems to work.

Jim Cohen · Post by **Jim Cohen** » 5 Apr 2002 6:18 am

You could always tell him his tone was acceptable...

Joseph V. Sapp · Post by **Joseph V. Sapp** » 5 Apr 2002 6:31 am

OK JIM !!!!!!
the cats out of the bag so to speak,,,the Vidio that I sent you ????? is the tone acceptable ?????
ROTFLMAO
God Bless,
Joseph

Derby SD-10-4X5,Profex ll
Lexicon MPX-100, Fender twin
Nashville 400

Dave Horner · Post by **Dave Horner** » 5 Apr 2002 6:39 am

Mike,

Further to Joey's point, the first time I heard Dylan's "Freewheelin'" album (I think that was his first) I thought it was some kind of a comedy album- like a Homer and Jethro deal of some kind. I listened to it after that just for laughs- until I grew to love it. Remember Tiny Tim? Well, I never was on the Carson show, but he was. I remember a few years ago a work colleague gave me a tape of a band that his daughter was in. The songs were morose, hideous, impossible to understand very well, the voices were awful and the musicianship was barely passable- at least all to my ear. While I wanted to console him for having this blight on his family name, I (fortunately) merely said it was interesting but somewhat beyond my limited musical taste. Some months later he gave me a news article of the group's ascension to rock stardom and later kept me apprised of the various hits which they produced. Point is- the fact that it sounds pitiful to me doesn't necessarily make it pitiful. If he's having fun and not hurting anyone encourage him and get an option on the right to manage him or, at least, a gig driving the bus.

Dave [This message was edited by Dave Horner on 05 April 2002 at 06:55 AM.]

Herb Steiner · Post by **Herb Steiner** » 5 Apr 2002 7:17 am

"I dig what you're trying to do" is always a favorite.

Also "the depth of your contribution to music is impossible to measure" is another seldom-used but always-effective suggestion.

------------------
Herb's Steel Guitar Pages
Texas Steel Guitar Association

[This message was edited by Herb Steiner on 05 April 2002 at 07:49 AM.]

Roger Rettig · Post by **Roger Rettig** » 5 Apr 2002 7:28 am

My favourite is: "I didn't know such music was possible....."

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Roger Rettig
Emmons LGIII(D10), MCI D10 and Fender Stringmaster (triple-8)

[This message was edited by Roger Rettig on 05 April 2002 at 07:29 AM.]

Bob Blair · Post by **Bob Blair** » 5 Apr 2002 7:36 am

I remember a rising star (long since fallen) singer once saying to me of a couple of songs I pitched him ."I don't think I heard a hit". He probably also used words to similar effect as Herb's "I dig what you are trying to do". Don't we all! By the way, a few years ago I revisted those tunes and I didn't hear a hit either.

Yeah right Jimbeaux, the acceptability of your tone has become a matter of legend - hey it worked for me so well I bought the guitar! We love you JC. By all means Mike, tell him his tone is acceptable - no need to diss his timbre!! Lord knows we have enough of that going around.

Also, you can always point out some areas where his guitar playine could use some work. Since it so obviously can. Encourage him to do some scale exercises or something. Tell him he could benefit from Tommy Tedesco's book or something. Or Alfred's book one if he is really that bad.

Like Johan says, it does take guts for most of us to put ourselves on the line that way. Don't lie but don't be mean.

Dennis Detweiler · Post by **Dennis Detweiler** » 5 Apr 2002 7:39 am

"It's time to build an addition onto your closet"
He doesn't have to know it's for his CDs and not his stage wardrobe and road attire.

Dennis

Erv Niehaus · Post by **Erv Niehaus** » 5 Apr 2002 7:53 am

Tell him the dog ate it before I had a chance to hear it!

Uff-Da!

Larry Behm · Post by **Larry Behm** » 5 Apr 2002 8:00 am

"It sounds just like you"!!

"What is most important is how do you feel about it"?

"What is or what was your goal"?

This is always a tough one.

Larry Behm