Worst gig ever

Harold Dye · Post by **Harold Dye** » 29 Jun 2010 7:22 pm

Back in the early 80's I was playing with a couple of guys in different bands. One of them found this Elvis imitator who was trying to put a band together. We got with the fellow and dicided to play a gig. He said this was a great place to play and he had quite a following there. When I drove up to this place I knew it might not be one of my better nights. There was a sign on the door which said "Not responsible for cut feet" This was a dry county and inside the door on the wall was newspaper clippings detailing raids that had been made in the past to seize certain beverages. This place had a dirt floor and they had cut small trees about 6" in diameter for the post scattered throughout the dance floor. The bandstand was about 3 feet high, I guess to get out of the mud in case the roof leaked. We found uptempo songs were were not advised because of all the dust they created on the dance floor. At times it looked like the dust bowl and I couldn't see the dancers(not that I wanted to). We took our first break to literally let the dust settle, and they had a large 42" exhaust fan in the wall pumping all the dust out. It was on low and since it was so big the blades could be seen as it turned. There was a cat sitting on the end of the stage staring at the fan. The guitar player said he thought the cat was going to jump but before he could say anything the critter made his leap. Somehow it made it thru the blades apparently with little damage to the fan or cat. All we saw was some bits of fur and no cat. I have not figured out to this day if it was the dust or our playing that demonized the cat. Shortly thereafter word spread that the law was making rounds and most of our patrons left in a cloud of dust, both inside and out.

Josh Yenne · Post by **Josh Yenne** » 2 Jul 2010 2:03 pm

Years ago we got hired to play an 'afterparty' for a sustainability festival out here.... I have told the story many times before and it is riddiculous on so many levels that it takes about 45 minutes to really tell it all... so I will try to stay brief...

But we set up in a room after talking to "Dances With Rainbows" (he did introduce himself as that, no he wasn't native american.. just some 23 yr. old hippy kid)... we were there at 5 I think... we were supposed to play at 7... right around that time they said "wait.. THE ELDER is almost here" they all filed into the room.. sat cross legged and started gyrating etc... then 5 people gave long speeches (8:30 pm now) Then a guy came up and gave a very very long speech and they all had their eyes closed... when he finally finished (after 9 now) we started walking in... and they tell us "no that wasn't the elder..that was just the ceremony BEFORE THE ELDER!!" we didn't go on until 11.. and right before we play they come to my mic and say "fire dancer outside in 5 minutes!" and the whole place clears and we end up playing to 3 people!

So much more to this story... we did get paid pretty well but if our gear wasn't set up directly behind all the speakers we would have packed up and left LONG before...

p.s the dinner they had promised ended up being some nutz and one block of cheese... so when we finally got out of there at midnight we were hallucinating hungry....

these are the BROAD sketches of this gig... it remains the worst ever for me...

chas smith · Post by **chas smith** » 2 Jul 2010 4:04 pm

A night in every bar band's life:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=24_tiGZg ... J7V_wnYSi0

WARNING !! WARNING !! WARNING !! There are some "bad" words being spoken in this one, and if that offends you, you DON'T want to see/listen to this one.

Charles Pompe · Post by **Charles Pompe** » 2 Jul 2010 6:27 pm

Played a 50th anniversary party. Turns out the Bride and Groom hated each other and hadn't spoken in years. One ugly gig!

Steve Gorman · Post by **Steve Gorman** » 2 Jul 2010 10:51 pm

I was a very young man, many many years ago... Met a sweet young thing, and to impress her, I asked her to accompany me to my first gig with what I thought was an up an coming country band. I just knew that I was gonna sweep her off her feet. Boy, did I have a lot to learn. She spent the night on the dancefloor, by the last set she was cozying up to some young cowboy, smooching right in front of me while I supplied the soundtrack. Man, that hurt. Lesson learned? You bet.

Ellis Miller · Post by **Ellis Miller** » 3 Jul 2010 4:13 am

We were booked to play an outdoor wedding reception on a ranch near Boulder, CO. It was the middle of August and hotter than h***. We were trying to get oriented when we heard a couple of the ranch hands talking.

The conversation was about three or four horses that were tethered near a barn in the blazing sun. The cowboys agreed that the horses needed to be moved because it was much too hot for them. "Besides", one said to the other, "that is where the band is going to set up".

Ernie Pollock · Post by **Ernie Pollock** » 3 Jul 2010 11:08 am

I remember playing in a bar in West Virgina one time, the owner slept in the back booth, it was small, no stage & some guy threw his guts up on the dance floor just a few feet from me, the floor was not level & it ran in my direction & I had to move back twice before I screamed at that owner to clean it up, he did & of course I was back there playing again in a few years & bless his heart he had a stage built!!

One other time [and there are more than just these 2] I was working with a terrible singer that just called & asked me to play, he was playing all the wrong notes he could find on the bass, with a drummer that was too damned loud and a lead guitar player that could not play 2 notes in a row & get em right, not to mention the rhythm guitar player, or lets say owner, I think he only knew wrong chords. & I was supposed to make these guys sound good, yeah, you gotta be kidding me. But I would guess most guys that played a lot have seen it all.

Ernie Pollock

The Steel Guitar Forum

Worst gig ever

Wow, sure have had some bad ones