Well I can bury this in a long thread..
If you only go out and play for money, you can dodge the responsibility if it turns out badly. You still have your dignity when because of your effort and your demanding to get paid for it, you can pay your telephone, electric, gas bill or buy a new music tool.
I've done this for as long as I remember. more than a couple thousand times.
If you play for "the art", and it turns out badly, you don't have anybody to blame but yourself. Then it's really hard to go out and do it again.
In the process, I've come across both the best and the worst.
In one case, or really more than that I remember thinking to myself, while I'm sitting there, smling, playing a "combat style" "crazy arms" or "truck driving man" agains a lousy rhythm section, or backing up a caterwalling drunken slob that has insulted a couple of my dear, but not so thick skinned friends when they tried their best to play with them: Some day you jerks will realise that I really didn't need the money, and that I must have played with them out of
pure spite..... Some of them have I suppose, as they finally dry out, hit bottom, or maybe even listen to some of their old live tapes. and realise that they haven't played a gig in years, and I've never quit..
Over the years, I have played with some pretty good bands in parts of their curve, or "shelf life". One where there was a perfect mix of a good job, a big crowd, the keyboard put just the right amount of speed in his speedball, the guitar player hadn't yet beaten the drummer half to death, and the drummer actually must have warmed the steel plate in his head just right, and was hitting close to actual "steady tempo". The bandleader was still writing checks that were good a couple days after the gig, for a couple of days, my amps were pointed just the right direction, I wasn't dog tired from having hauled paving machines til a half hour before the gig... You know.. "Zoning". Then it fell apart.. The best ones always seem to.
Well at the end of it, I actually got my "artistic integrity", even if "nobody else" saw or heard it, and I can still write it off as I "did it for the money". Why it "fell apart", Well maybe it was a divorce, maybe in the end it was the keyboard putting too much "ball" in his speedballs and ended up in methadone treatment, maybe just a lousy guitar player, or a bandleader that had too big of a cell phone bill, bar tab, or child support payment, and too small of a brain.
Either way, I did it for the money, it's not my fault, it's not my problem, and they know that if they called me up, with VERY few exceptions, that I'd work for them. That should pretty much un-nerve them. Especially those that finally sobered up..
"Fun".
"Fun" like "Artistic Integrity", is more likely and often as not nothing more than...
Subtle Tyranny.
I'll take the Liberty and what Integrity, and Pure FUN that seems to belong to..
The Mercinary.
There's usually as much Integrity, all things considered.
Artistic and otherwise..
Definitely as much or more "Amusement".
(I've tried to use the Money wisely.)
I'll make $125 for this weekend that will go for the copays on my spouses' long delayed doctor visit. The upcoming month's worth of gigs will pay my house insurance, or buy a new set of alumitone lace pickups besides if I want. All without spending a penny of what I make on my ample "paycheck".
There's always, and maybe thankfully enough economic impetus to be interested in going out and doing it again, and helping promote "the band".
I only made 48 grand last year, which is probably about half of what most folks make that have time for the Internet, and probably about what b0b pays his Limo Driver
If I was a Trust Fund Baby I might have a little less "motivation" I guess, and consequentially might have missed a LOT of music I REALLY ENJOYED PLAYING. All things considered.
Another reason lately is my long neglected Guitar PLaying.
I'm working with a real solid, old time and well schooled guitar player that is encouraging the heck out of me, even when I know it isn't very "polished" yet.
"Enjoyment"?
You should enjoy the Total Result of what you do, or no, it probably
isn't worth it.
Much like a Job.
Some people live for their jobs and have no lives whatsoever.
Some have jobs that are really worth living for.
Some people hate their jobs.
Some people enjoy the fact that they "can do their jobs" as much as actually doing them. I find this myself in hauling heavy equipment, lining out and "foremanning" a group of dump truck drivers, as well as in my music, which is stlll my top priority in "things I do for my spiritual well being". Most of the "nuts and bolts" of both are very hard, and sometimes tedious, and physically and even mentally overwhelming.
Oh well. That's what Life is. Overwhelming. Mortality.
Some people, no matter where they are, are never satisfied with it, and waste all the time they spend in "The Present".
That's where I choose to live mine, for the most part.
I wish to imply no "judgement" to any facet of playing music, merely a statement of what I've noticed in the "motivation" department.
With enough actually experience that I would probably know.
Thanks for the indulgence.
It's Amusing being able to write about it as well.
EJL