How can anybody be so disrespectful?

Mike Perlowin · Post by **Mike Perlowin** » 24 Mar 2003 12:05 pm

Saturday night I played at a Moose lodge. (The first straight country gig I've done in over 10 years.) At one point in the evening, I played an unaccompanied version of Danny Boy and right in the middle of the song some guy from the audience walked up to the stage, stood directly in front of me, and started talking to the bass player.

I almost lost it. I didn't, and just kept on playing, but I felt like stopping and asking him if my playing was interfering with his yammering.

It's bad enough people in the audience talk during a performance, but this was something else. How can anybody be so disrespectful and insensitive and just plain rude to a performer?

Stu Schulman · Post by **Stu Schulman** » 24 Mar 2003 12:53 pm

Mike,I had that happen to me right in the middle of"Over the Rainbow"Some woman walked up to me and started yakin at me,I stopped playing,she said"You didn't have to stop playin" to which I replied "Oh yes I do,Now what the hell is so important that I had to stop what I was doing?Her answer was that she wanted to hear "Boot Scoot Boogie"I told her to Boot Scoot her butt out of the club,and to take her idiot boyfiend with her.The answer is easy.One extra knee lever to work a can of Mace,And an extra pedal to work a small baseball bat,Like the kind they knock out big Salmon with after they get in the boat.Let me know if that
works Mike,I'm
working on some other alternatives.Stu

Jim Eaton · Post by **Jim Eaton** » 24 Mar 2003 12:55 pm

I would have said "your village called, their idot is missing" and made sure to keep my bar in my hand when I went on my next break.
JE:-)>

Dan Farrell · Post by **Dan Farrell** » 24 Mar 2003 12:59 pm

Mike- I am primarily a bass player, so I hope your bass player did not respond to the oaf who tried to ask him something during your song. It just goes to show that borish, obnoxious behavior never goes out of style!

Dan Farrell
Anaheim CA
'97 carter D-10
Nashville 1000

Bobby Lee · Post by **Bobby Lee** » 24 Mar 2003 1:00 pm

A Moose Lodge is not a concert hall. I would just accept that fact, and move on.

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<img align=right src="http://b0b.com/b0b.gif" width="64" height="64">Bobby Lee - email: quasar@b0b.com - gigs - CDs
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Theresa Galbraith · Post by **Theresa Galbraith** » 24 Mar 2003 1:05 pm

Mike,
I think that was rude.
Disrespectful is what the Dixie Chic's said on foreigh soil.

Mike Neer · Post by **Mike Neer** » 24 Mar 2003 1:06 pm

There's some wisdom in there, b0b. Mike, don't take it personally, I'm sure it won't be the last time it happens.

Larry Bell · Post by **Larry Bell** » 24 Mar 2003 1:07 pm

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:<HR>How can anybody be so disrespectful and insensitive and just plain rude to a performer?
<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Mike, I'm surprised that someone who's been around as long as you is so shocked at that happening. If they try to talk to me while I'm playing, I just look right through them as if they weren't there and keep on playing. They usually go pester someone else in the band (hopefully not center stage). Yes, it's rude, but some people ARE RUDE. Another piece of this is that private club members (Moose, Elk, VFW, etc.) often act as if each member is the boss and take whatever liberties they feel that station affords them. It takes all kinds . . . and if you play bars and clubs long enough you'll run into ALL OF THEM.

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Larry Bell - email: larry@larrybell.org - gigs - Home Page
2003 Fessenden S/D-12 8x8, 2000 Fessenden S-12 8x8, 1969 Emmons S-12 6x6, 1971 Dobro, Standel and Peavey Amps[This message was edited by Larry Bell on 24 March 2003 at 01:11 PM.]

Earnest Bovine · Post by **Earnest Bovine** » 24 Mar 2003 1:26 pm

Lighten up!

Bill Terry · Post by **Bill Terry** » 24 Mar 2003 1:55 pm

I always found the Moose Lodge clientele to be of a much higher class than the VFW crowd.

Post by **Joey Ace** » 24 Mar 2003 2:42 pm

I've gotta agree with b0b.
It's rude, but no big deal.

I would have expected the Bass Player to lead the rude customer away from the stage to continue the conversation.

When I started to read your post, Mike, I thought the customer was gonna come on stage, grab a live mike, and belt out an off-key rendition of "Danny Boy" to accompany your solo.

There's little respect for musicians in this "Karakoe/You Can Be A Pop Star" world. Too bad, but you're not gonna change it.

David L. Donald · Post by **David L. Donald** » 24 Mar 2003 2:54 pm

Sunday night I was sitting in with a nice amateur irish group. Some nimrod walks in and likes the music...
Fine, but then he stands next to me while I am trying to grab the guitarists chords on the fly,
and 4 times ask me if the IRISH music is from Texas... he's in a bloody IRISH BAR.

Of course this IS in French which I can understand and speak, but not fast, in noisy enviroments...
and not when I am trying to improvise with a 5 piece band at break neck tempos.

Mike I fully understand, I wanted to throttle the dimwit. I am used to the people of this world who have not a clue of the musicians artistry, but even that said this guy was way over the top.

Your guy was rude...no two ways about it,
but at least he wasn't INSISTING on talking to YOU during you solo. And demanding a response in another language!

Mike Perlowin · Post by **Mike Perlowin** » 24 Mar 2003 2:54 pm

Bob is right. A moose lodge is not a concert hall. I did this gig because I needed the money, and will probably do a few more for the same reason, but ultimatley I intend to start playing at places where people actually listen to the music and respect the musicians.

Bill Ford · Post by **Bill Ford** » 24 Mar 2003 2:55 pm

Joey Ace,
I saw a drunk do just that to a friend of mine,he just very politely quit playing,packed his stuff and left.Really PO'd me cause I was enjoying some great playing.

Mike,
All drunks are the same,redneck or highbrow.

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Bill Ford

HowardR · Post by **HowardR** » 24 Mar 2003 3:13 pm

A Moose Lodge is not a concert hall

to a moose, it is b0b....

Dr. Hugh Jeffreys · Post by **Dr. Hugh Jeffreys** » 24 Mar 2003 3:32 pm

Your complaint reminds me of one of the best---if not the best==jazz quartet I've ever heard--The Joe Mooney Quartet. Joe Mooney was a blind accordanist with clary, guitar, and bass. In the 40's, they had a gig in Chicago which paid each $600.00 a week each--not bad for the times. I never saw them, but have some of their recordings. They quit the gig because they became tired of the loud-mouth drinkers talking over their music. Joe Mooney began doing singles playing organ. Too bad, however, when you perform in public, especially a beer hall or cocktail lounge, many people are more interested in vociferous expression or belly-rubbing with some chick on the dance floor. HJ

Donny Hinson · Post by **Donny Hinson** » 24 Mar 2003 4:13 pm

...but ultimatley I intend to start playing at places where people actually listen to the music and respect the musicians.

Oh, you mean at "steel jams"?

Rick Schmidt · Post by **Rick Schmidt** » 24 Mar 2003 5:06 pm

On more than a few occations I've had stereotypical knuckleheads try to hold complete conversations with me while I'm actually SINGING on stage, not to mention playing my steel guitar. In sh*t hole dives, swanky country clubs and concert halls alike, you're just gonna find that the musically and socially clueless are everywhere. It really does bring a reality check to this honky tonk headache that I like to call "my life" though!

Some people are just never gonna get it. Theyre never gonna "hear" it. Never gonna appreciate it. Never gonna understand it. Never gonna like it....and unfortunately, never gonna respect it. I'm sure Mozart and Miles Davis experienced the same responce. So you're in good company! Like somebody said already, just chalk it up to experience & go to the next gig while trying not to be too cynical.

BTW, I too could write a lengthy post in the "Have you ever had a fight at a gig" thread, but I won't.

Terry Wood · Post by **Terry Wood** » 24 Mar 2003 8:26 pm

Yep, people can be really rude. I myself used to raise all kinds of heck, playing the smoking bars, and fancy clubs where you didn't even get in without a suit and tie.

I've had them fight right up on the stage and tear a place a part and we just kept on a pickin'.

Gotta share this though, the late Julian Tharpe was the darndest musician I've ever seen. He could be flying all over the neck of the steel guitar. Somebody would walk up start talking to him. He'd carry on a conversation with them for quite sometime, light up a cigarette, take a drink and be playing all over the steel all at the same time. If you never seen him do this, it was really something. It was likethe guy had four hands, and two minds. Never seen anybody else come close to doing that. I sure miss him and his super picking!

Woody
John 3:16

Bobby Snell · Post by **Bobby Snell** » 24 Mar 2003 8:34 pm

That's what 300 watt amps are for. Just smile and play loud.

Bobbe Seymour · Post by **Bobbe Seymour** » 24 Mar 2003 8:37 pm

This is really great reading!

FONT SIZE=1 COLOR="#8e236b">[This message was edited by BobbeSeymour on 24 March 2003 at 08:39 PM.][This message was edited by BobbeSeymour on 26 March 2003 at 02:00 PM.]

kyle reid · Post by **kyle reid** » 24 Mar 2003 8:52 pm

I had a guy come up to me in the middle of a solo & say, That looks easy ', some day I'm going to learn how to play one of those, I said good, then I can come up & talk to you while your playing it,If I'm still around.

Michael Johnstone · Post by **Michael Johnstone** » 24 Mar 2003 9:14 pm

I was playing down at the Crest Lounge in Reseda some years ago and there was this wood railing around the stage that was made to look like a ranch fence.I was set up on one side of the stage right up against the rail.There was a woman at the table right up against the other side of the railing who kept draping her hand across the rail with a lit cigarette while deep in a drunken stupor oblivious to the fact that she was seriously violating my airspace. Finally,after she absent-mindedly flicked the ash off onto my MSA,I snapped,plucked the cigarette out of her hand,doused it in her margarita and kept on playing "Silver Wings".I kept waiting for repercussions but she just sat there dumfounded for a minute and then got up and left. The funny thing was nobody in my band saw any of it - nor did anyone at her table - except her of course. Thankfully it is now illegal to smoke in public establishments in California. -MJ-

Scott Jackson · Post by **Scott Jackson** » 24 Mar 2003 9:27 pm

Hi Guys, new member here, long time picker.
Been there done that. Most of the time we get to play places with booze and idiots. That's part of the gig. Just ignore it and do your thing.
It's only the Moose, could have been worse.
Keep smilin',
Scott

Jim Phelps · Post by **Jim Phelps** » 25 Mar 2003 2:46 am

When I was 19 years old and on my first road trip, we were playing "You're No Good", the pop hit recorded by Linda Ronstadt, and a guy came up to the stage and stood right in front of me, looked me right in the face and said, "You're no good, you're no good, you're no good" and he wasn't singing along with the band. Now that was rude, and really hurt my feelings...probably a good thing I was young and naive and too shocked to do anything like jump on him. Another time I was playing my steel and some dumb bimbo lost it while dancing and landed right up against my steel and started to go right into my lap. I just pushed her butt off me and my steel and back into the dance floor, they were so stupid they smiled, but I was ticked. I can't count how many people have come up and tried to ask a request while I'm trying to play a nice serious solo. If I feel like it, I'll half-listen while I'm playing, if I don't, I just don't even look up and force them to wait until I'm ready or they just yak away and I ignore them. The weirdest was probably when I was playing and minding my own business and never saw anyone approach the stage, and suddenly a pair of hands from somewhere behind me started going all over my hair. I looked around and some girl was standing behind me with her fingers in my hair! Well I figured it ain't the worst thing that ever happened to me and people were laughing so I played along and made a funny face or something, next thing I knew she was unbuttoning my shirt and put her hands in my shirt all over the place... about that time the bouncer came up and grabbed her and hauled her off the stage. She took a swing at him and he threw her out. All this stuff is ridiculous and in theory we shouldn't have to put up with it, but I'm afraid it comes with the territory. [This message was edited by Jim Phelps on 25 March 2003 at 02:47 AM.]